Dating Kyle

Hey! I’m Kyle!

I love sharing intimate experiences in this weird life thing we’ve found ourselves in!

I’d love to date more without swiping or as many guessing games, and to be transparent & true to who I am to save us both energy & time

So here’s an estimate of “me” & what I’m looking for in a partner.

If interested in dating please say hi @!


This is me!


This is also me!


Woops! that’s Naruto Uzumaki from hit anime series: Naruto


Oh, that’s me again!

Here’s the gist

  • I’m 27, a guy, straight (-enough), in SF, from Canada 🇨🇦! 5 ft 11 (6ft on tinder)
  • Career: studied math/cs, robots 🤖 at Carnegie Mellon, AI at Cruise, Business at Harvard 🎓, dropped out to join a circus & run a company 🍌, now living at/helping run AGIHouse and throwing hackathons
  • Looking for women, open to trans / nonbinary in some cases
  • I’d love to find a life-long soul mate ❤️
  • Also open to short/mid term casual dating, cuddling, hooks ups, stable relationships, & obscure adventures
  • Ideal is being in-person San Francisco/NorCal & open to travel. I travel lots but can see California being a home base.
  • Open to kids, not planning on it in next 4 years
  • Did poly & open to it but i lean to wanting monogamous & stable
  • I’m ENT-J, kink friendly, agnostic, a smidge of anarchism
  • Have dated for 10 yrs, many casual dates, a few 1-3mo relationships, a couple long-term serious monogamous relationships.

Here’s the not-gist

✅ What others love about me

I’ve become quite emotionally aware, introspective, cooperative, open minded
  • “Kyle applies feedback faster than anyone I’ve ever met, give him feedback and he absorbs it, he works relentlessly to improve himself to be a supporter and provider”
  • “kyle writes a lot, to dissect/analyze and challenge things and that's a skill that will eventually help you a lot. You can make jokes about him having a notion/excel for almost everything but at some point you'll start journaling more because of him and you'll see its really helpful”
  • I’m playful, silly, funny, satirical, witty
I started with little, but now have an authentic self esteem, health, wealth, and inspiring life

I grew up 1st child in an unstable household. I began as an awkward, traumatized, lethargic broke teenager

I chose to get my life together, and went from failing out of school to becoming top of my class in Uni, a researcher at Carnegie Mellon, engineer at Cruise, I got into Harvard but dropped out to join a circus and run a company because I felt like it, and helped bring millions of dollars to this company.

I grew up as an oldest son, but took the role of becoming a wealthy provider and father-figure in my family.

I feel jacked, I’m happy, I know pretty well what I want and love my life.

I have insecurities & weakness but I’m open to work through them

I don’t have drug addiction, I eat clean food, sleep 8 hrs a night, feel healthy, my romantic relationships have been mutually supportive & loving even if they come to an end.

I didn’t continue the cycle of conflict I was born into.

I’m proud of all this & I hope it shows 🙂

Spongebob still makes me laugh unironically

(if that’s a problem you’re a naughty barnacle)

  • I don’t drink alcohol or smoke, or gamble, or act violent, but I love adventure & having a fun time
  • I’m transparent & loyal, my partners trust me
I care a lot about supporting my partner in their life & goals

I naturally take the role of personal cheerleader & supporter

I often express support via emotional availability, financial help, being a sounding board for ideas, challenging ideas

  • I’ve watched 100s of baby harp seal vids on Youtube, was one of the 1st subscribers to the baby harp seal channel.
  • I’m pretty fit: I exercise ~2 hours per day at circus center SF, I love getting involved in any sports you may like!
I’m a pretty confident manly man but also have a sensitive / emotional side

🟥 Stuff I’m working on that creates tension in relationships

I have a scattered mind

“Kyle has severe ADHD, even if you just mentioned something 5s before he may forget it and it isn't because he doesn't care, it is just how his brain works so don't take it personally.” ~an ex

“Kyle had a very traumatic childhood and he's learning to create new habits & brain pathways especially around processing emotions. He needs to feel listened to, needs lot of space, and sometimes needs some guidance on emotions.” ~an ex

Sometimes I’m a bit dense

“You'll notice Kyle loves you first but he'll take some time to say it, so if he's not saying it just give it time.” ~ an ex

I sometimes miss body language that feels obvious to my partner

I have a sporadic schedule as an entrepreneur
  • Sometimes I’m up late and can’t come to bed, or i’m deep in thought working through a sales process.
  • I’m not the consistent 9-5 worker who has the evening free
  • I may get multiple days of downtime and spend it all with a partner, or maybe i’ll have a stretch of a few days where it’s very heavy workload.
  • I often schedule time with a partner to make sure I spend it with them,
  • Even with scheduling time, this can sometimes create tension if someone wants the more natural “work 9-5 and come home to be with family” aesthetic.
The amount that I love capitalism & eating meat
  • I’m happy to date socialists/activists/vegans, I appreciate different perspectives & don’t expect you to agree with me on everything
  • But, I do love competitive economics & I eat whole rotisserie chickens for fun
  • I’d like to not change these things to date 😃


Who I’m looking for

The typical things apply, trust, honesty, fun, etc, who doesn’t want these? Here are specifics



we can work through conflict by talking, it feels safe

Cooperative & secure attachment

we can work through conflict or changes in our relationship with open communication, together, as opposed to ghosting

For breakups in the past I’ve liked to setup “offboarding dates”, instead of sudden distance, a gradual change where we can see eachother a few times as friends/etc, express how we feel, talk through tension

This is critical for me to continue reinforcing a secure attachment style, as I’m still processing some childhood abandonment anxiety.

You can listen to feelings without criticizing, mocking, or invalidating them
  • I’m learning to communicate affection and love more.
  • Listening doesn’t mean agreeing, or reciprocating.
  • For example, I’ve had relationships where I fall in love hard with someone but find out they don’t feel the same love.
  • Yeah, this hurts, classic heart break, but that’s ok, what mattered is I could talk with this person, tell them how I felt, they were able to listen, and validate that, while still setting the boundary for themselves that they don’t reciprocate the love, or want the relationship I do at the time.
  • This allows me to be supportive and process things in days not months.
Physical, mental, emotional health
  • When times get hard, your default is some healthy coping mechanism like meditation or going to the gym. you have a strong grasp on what your emotional & health needs are, and ability to prioritize those. Even if it means we broke up/etc, I’ll always respect your needs.

Nice to haves: these aren’t all required, they are just typically things I fall in love with in a person

playfulness, silliness
  • the kind of person who dances at the party when no one else is dancing yet,
  • someone who likes things like slapstick comedy, circus, clowning, monty python
sensing, feeling, mindful, sometimes spiritual

My personality often compliments the more feeling/sensing types, I appreciate the mindset a lot!

intellectual stimulation
  • I love when a day ends with “hey, how was your day, what’s new?” and there’s a lot to talk about!
  • It could be what’s going on with family, or general, or a research paper your read, or what you learned in meditation, or some course you’re taking for fun
  • I just love people who have new things to talk about regularly
Likes to travel

I often do little 2week-2mo long adventures around the world + business travel, I’ve travelled to taiwan, germany, mexico, korea, east africa … many others

I often go where career takes me but I can see California/SF becoming a more stable location

physical health/movement
  • I love circus! I do it almost every day, I particularly love handbalancing, I’m open to explore any movement activities you do be it hiking, running etc,
open mindedness
  • I love when people can think about the world in different ways.
  • People who choose what they want to believe as a result of thinking about the options instead of subscribing to whatever ideology they’re born into.
  • I don’t like following rules for rules sake, I almost naturally try to break rules like this.
  • I like doing what’s best for us in our context as a relationship, and I try not to project traditional systems onto it unless they are good for us.
being weird
  • This is consistently a huge attractive trait for me. I almost guaranteed want to go on more dates if someone is weird.
  • Be it a kink, or an obsessive collection of some kind, or a scary amount of knowledge about the history of cannibalism that you’d never bring up on a date because it’d scare a person away but you brought it up anyway for some reason. I find it hilarious.
  • If dating you is going to be a unique or unusual experience I’d probably want to try it out even just on the premise of wanting to see what happens.
overcoming struggles
  • I’m deeply attracted to people who have a kind of becoming story.
  • It’s probably because I saw my parent go through a lot of struggle, and still make it through, and so I admire that
  • Whether it be growing up lower income in an oppressive environment, and now you’re living a more stable life or maybe you had your own physical or emotional or mental setback but you’ve had a 10 year journey to work through it and have become far more proud of yourself.
  • I especially like struggles that most people don’t see at first glance, the quiet things, the ones that don’t sound like a struggle but they really were for you.
  • In addition, when someone goes through a hard struggle but they are still optimistic, they can still smile and love. Incredibly attractive.
high agency
  • When someone has a decent idea of what they want in life, and can define it & take steps to pursue it.
  • It doesn’t mean you always have to have everything figured out, it’s moreso a mindset of being able to continuously improve, to not identify with a victim mentality, to craft the life you want based on your values and do even weird things if needed to pursue the things you care about.

What kind of relationship am I looking for?

I can see this playing out in a few scenarios, choose your adventure!

Casual/Exploratory: Cuddling, nonsexual intimacy, deep plutonic conversations, other subsets of relationship anarchy

This is an underrated category in my experience.

Not everything has to follow The Relationship Escalator

I’ve noticed there can be really positive relationships just being able to hug someone & share a deep emotional connection

I’m also down to try out dating if we truly don’t know what to expect

Life-long soul mate (even forever. contingent on singularity or afterlife being a thing)

Honestly, I keep giving myself heart break here.

Loving deeply & dreaming about “forever and ever” often leads to heartbreak.

Still, just because something is hard, doesn’t mean I’m not going to do it. I allow myself to fall in love.

I’d love to grow old with someone, to have a partner in crime in life, to look back and share decades of memories together, to feel such immense pain if one of us were gone, as if a hole was left in our chests.

I value experiencing deep love and I want to have the freedom to love even though I know it signs me up to be heartbroken.

Like, you ever see the opening for the Pixar movie UP, where the old man is reminiscing about his life. It makes you wanna cry. I yearn for this.

“Life isn’t measured by the number of breaths you take but by the moments that take your breath away”


If interested in dating please say hi @!

Tent setup while hosting a 26 hour x 26 mile marathon x hackathon.  Yeah it’s what it sounds like!
Tent setup while hosting a 26 hour x 26 mile marathon x hackathon. Yeah it’s what it sounds like! see thread here